In 2022, I posted a helpful guide for corporations who want to cash in on the grandeur and glory of ‘Pride Month’:
Have corporations learned anything since then? Ummmm…it depends on who you ask. You would think Target and Anheuser-Busch would have learned not just #GoWokeGoBroke but #WeDidPrideAndSalesDied. We’ll have to wait and see how it goes this year. I’ll be watching, will you?
I reread the piece linked above to see if there was anything I needed to update, and saw that I had queried if Pride-supporting companies were familiar with all the many genders out there. Because ‘all genders are valid’, right?
The Trevor Project instructs that ‘gender and sex exist on a spectrum, meaning that there are a lot of different ways that people can express their gender identity or sex’. And when they say this, they don’t mean simply on a spectrum of masculine to feminine. Booooooring!!! Why choose that very limited range of a million ways to be, when you can be SO! MUCH!! MORE!!! In my piece I linked to a Fandom Gender Wiki and noted that there were currently 330 genders listed. Hmmmm, I thought, two years have gone by…surely a few more genders have been added to this list.
Yes. Quite a few more.
3,648 more, in fact!
Actually, one more was added since I took this screenshot so there are, in fact, as of Sunday morning, May 19, 2024, at 11:43 am Eastern Standard Time, 3,979 gender identities. And each one has its own flag! Here are some highlights:
But why stop there?! If ‘Thirdboy’ is still too limited for you:
Some people are not even trying. Whoever is behind ‘Femifluid’—come on, you can’t even come up with a flag?! How are we supposed to take you seriously? Better call in sick to Starbucks today so you can work on this:
More food genders……
Tomatogender seems almost clever…and this is all just harmless fun, right? Oh, wait…
I know what you’re wondering at this point: Isn’t anyone thinking of the fascists?! Of course they are.
Lightning round…here’s some N’s, S’s, and W’s:
If you have time to kill and need some laffs, go peruse the full (and ever-growing) list and comment below with your favorite! Are there any glaring omissions? What about Doughboygender, for those of us who involuntarily giggle when we get poked in the stomach? Or Kansasgender, if all you are is dust in the wind? What gender best describes YOU?!
All this and Piers Morgan can't identify as a penguin. I have never heard of such hypocrisy and injustice. I identify as "over it gender" and "pronounphobic." My flag is the shape of the middle finger🖕🏼with an orange flame on the nail. 🔥
I propose we gay people who know that’s our solid identity boycott pride month and let these confused kids have at it in full Monty display. It’s total theater and attention getting performance.